The Bad Movie Pilgrims

    This is the honorable role call of those brave souls prepared to brave the terrors of bad movie hell. If you would like to join these hallowed ranks, take a look at the guidelines, and come join the crusade.

Simon 'The Seer' Drake

    If there is a man whose knowledge of bad movies surpasses that of the Prophet, then that man is Simon Drake. A long-term connoisseur of crap, Simon has seen things in his time that man was not meant to wot of, using - and in many cases abusing - the free video credits gained as an employee of Blockbuster Video to view things that no sane person would shell out money for. By such efforts, he has acquired an unparalleled knowledge of the depths to which filmmakers can and will stoop. He is also the only man alive who will voluntarily watch Tango & Cash just so he can write a bad movie review about it.

    Our hats are off.


  1. Gone in 60 Seconds
  2. Dungeons & Dragons
  3. Jake Speed
  4. Tango & Cash
  5. Escape From LA
  6. Better Off Dead
  7. One Crazy Summer
  8. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Movie
  9. Passenger 57
  10. Waxwork
  11. The Rescue
  12. Enter the Ninja
  13. Demon Knight
  14. Pearl Harbour
  15. Escape from DS3
  16. Ticks
  17. Dracula 2001
  18. Ripper
  19. Watchers
  20. Judge Dredd
  21. Double Impact
  22. Flash Gordon
  23. The Goonies
  24. Fire, Ice and Dynamite
  25. Stewardess School
  26. Cutting Class
  27. Dead Heat
  28. Atlantis - The Lost Empire
  29. Planet of the Apes
  30. Deep Star Six
  31. Trancers 3: Deth Lives
  32. Sunset Beat
  33. Smilla's Feeling for Snow
  34. The Fast and the Furious
  35. Ice Pirates
  36. Night Flier
  37. Turbulence 3
  38. Biggles: Adventures in Time
  39. Earth vs. the Spider
  40. The World is Not Enough
  41. The Rock
  42. Hong Kong 97
  43. Footloose
  44. Postmortem
  45. Universal Soldier - The Return
  46. Ghosts of Mars
  47. Spitfire
  48. Chase Moran
  49. The Sea Wolf
  50. The Transporter
  51. The Swarm
  52. Trancers
  53. Komodo
  54. Ankle Biters
  55. AbrAxas
  56. Mighty Jack
  57. Zone Troopers
  58. Trancers 2
  59. Dollman
  60. Dollar for the Dead
  61. Prototype
  62. Ballistic: Ecks vs Sever
  63. Cradle 2 the Grave
  64. Hell Comes to Frogtown
  65. Troll
  66. Flying Virus
  67. Infested
  68. Hitcher II
  69. Cabin Fever
  70. Timecop 2
  71. Down

James 'The Judge' Holloway

    Cutting his teeth on Mystery Science Theatre 3000, James Holloway is our man in the New World. A veteran of such Myst'ed classics as Horror at Party Beach and Manos: the Hands of Fate (acknowledged by those in the know to boot Plan 9 From Outer Space into touch in the battle royale for the title 'worst movie ever'), he went on to serve a long and arduous apprenticeship in the halls of Mecca. James is a hardened warrior on the bad movie battlefield, whose in-depth knowledge of crap-sockey and genuine, home-grown Americrapola is invaluable to the Bad Movie Mecca.


  1. Fantasy Mission Force
  2. The Musketeer
  3. Razor Blade Smile
  4. Bones
  5. A Knight's Tale
  6. Equilibrium
  7. The Scorpion King
  8. Nemesis
  9. Velocity Trap
  10. Predator 2
  11. Justice League of America
  12. The Four Feathers
  13. The Da Vinci Code

Allison 'Snow White' Holloway

    A relative newcomer to this business, Allison entered the game with the avowed intent of becoming a 'mediocre but sane' Bad Movie Crusader. She is also one of the few BMM reviewers likely to provide reviews of dodgy RomCom.


  1. Bulletproof Monk
  2. Heartbreakers

Tim 'The Torturer' Deegan

    Another veteran of Mecca, and the man responsible for Surf Nazis Must Die. Not for the film itself, which is surely more burden than any one man could bear; just for me having seen it, which is almost as bad.


  1. Cradle of Fear
  2. Dagon


    Half-man, half-ant, or something. A Bad Movie veteran, albeit until recently a silent one, this fine fellow also provides the webspace where the BMM resides.


  1. Dobermann
  2. Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle
  3. Resident Evil
  4. Beastmaster III: The Eye of Braxus
  5. Redline
  6. Double Team
  7. Evil Ed
  8. Naked Killer
  9. The Unholy
  10. The Killing of Satan

The Prophet

    Your host here at the Bad Movie Mecca. The Prophet's bad movie experience is impressive, going back over many years of dedicated bad movie viewing. Studying the basics of bad movies with Simon Drake, he undertook a three year pilgrimage in Mecca to hone his skills and thicken his skin. Very little is too bad for The Prophet, an avid viewer of Xena: Warrior Princess, as well as more respectable genre fare such as Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, Farscape, and Stargate SG-1. Be warned however, that Roar, Tarzan, The New Adventures of Robin Hood, and Cleopatra 2525 have all exceeded the tolerance levels of even this hardy frontiersman on the bleak borders of the dire.

    The Prophet is also the man to contact if you want to contribute the rotten fruits of your own bad movie experiences to the BMM.


  1. Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace
  2. Hellbound
  3. Beowulf
  4. The Toho Godzilla Films
  5. Waxwork II: Lost in Time
  6. Omega Doom
  7. Sanctuary
  8. Highlander II: The Quickening
  9. Highlander III: The Sorcerer
  10. Highlander: Endgame
  11. Godzilla
  12. Buffy the Vampire Slayer
  13. Dungeons & Dragons
  14. Krull
  15. Conan the Barbarian
  16. Conan the Destroyer
  17. Red Sonja
  18. Kull the Conqueror
  19. Hawk the Slayer
  20. DNA
  21. Split Second
  22. Warlock
  23. Warlock II
  24. Warlock III
  25. Anaconda
  26. Dark Angel
  27. Babes in Toyland
  28. Fright Night Part II
  29. Hemoglobin
  30. Antitrust
  31. The Mummy Returns
  32. Lust for a Vampire
  33. Zoltan, Hound of Dracula
  34. Vampire Circus
  35. The Lost World
  36. Blast
  37. The Specials
  38. Mean Guns
  39. Lara Croft: Tomb Raider
  40. The One
  41. Guardian
  42. Storm Riders
  43. Valentine
  44. The Hunted
  45. Amazons & Gladiators
  46. Full Eclipse
  47. The Three Musketeers
  48. From Dusk Till Dawn
  49. From Dusk Till Dawn 2: Texas Blood Money
  50. From Dusk Till Dawn 3: The Hangman's Daughter
  51. Kiss of the Dragon
  52. Impostor
  53. The Horrible Dr Bones
  54. Out for Justice
  55. Dune - extended TV version
  56. Sweepers
  57. The Order
  58. Sabotage
  59. Burn, Hollywood Burn
  60. And Now the Screaming Starts!
  61. The Sword and the Sorcerer
  62. The Silent Flute
  63. The Howling VI: The Freaks
  64. 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea
  65. Terminator 3: The Rise of the Machines
  66. Double Team
  67. End of Days
  68. The Peacemaker
  69. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze
  70. Darkman III: Die, Darkman, Die
  71. The Da Vinci Code
  72. Underworld
  73. X-Men: The Last Stand

Jimmy the Hat

    A newcomer to the Mecca. May he enter freely and of his own will, and leave behind something of the happiness that he brings.

  1. The Secret of My Success